Under Pressure

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In this issue: Under Pressure, Pushing Down On Me, Pressing Down On You

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Under Pressure

I was talking this morning with a close friend.

He’s been going through some tough times.

It’s been a rough year for many of us, it’s no secret.

Business has had its ups and downs (a lot more downs than ups, if we’re speaking frankly).

Relationships have had some extreme swings.

Shit’s hit the fan REAL hard a few times.

Nobody wants this kind of pressure.

Nobody wants to risk everything they’ve built.

No one likes to go through all the fear and uncertainty and upheavals.

It’s easy to pray when things are going well, but we rarely do so from gratitude.

Our memories are too damn short.

We block out the trauma, the streaks of black.

The yelling, the screaming, the threats, the internal doubts and beatings, the negative bank balance staring back at us.

No one likes to look back at the abyss once it’s passed.

… Or, do we?

Not all of us, clearly.

Few of us would ever admit to it, anyway.

But let’s be straight here.

Some people thrive when they’re put under insane pressure.

Some of us really, actually are made to either be chaos agents or to embrace chaos.

Some of us artists, creatives, night owls, people who suck at finances, sometimes fail the marshmallow test, people born poor and disadvantaged, yet with massive ambitions.

People used to living on the immediate periphery of the pulsing action (think Brooklyn and Queens, with access to Manhattan), far enough to barely afford rent, close enough to smell and taste the chaos at our chosen epicenter of the world.

Think of all the best novels, songs, paintings, poetry and by whom they were created and where.

Lots of provincial kids coming to the Big City (New York, Paris, London, San Francisco, Berlin, Moscow, etc.) and finding a way to survive, then finding a way to chronicle their experiences, establish communities, make a living and bring in more like themselves.

And the pressure? Well, it’s legion.

And if you’re a Millennial or Gen Z facing soaring rent and food costs in a big metropolis, you’re far from a pioneer.

Think Hemingway in Paris in the 20s and 30s. Hell, think of almost any artist or writer not from means in Paris in the 20s, New York in the 50s, Vienna in the 1890s, Moscow in the 60s, etc.

These are some of the people we know best (or so we think) and that inspire us the most.

People that went through hell, and just kept going, and chronicled their adventures.

You think you were through some crazy pressures, trying to deal with college and grad school debt and high rent and cost of living?

Many of those guys were starving, living and creating on the edge.

How did they manage all the pressure?

Well, we only hear about the ones that somehow caught proverbial fire and managed to make enough revenue to keep going, eventually to buy an apartment or boat, to travel more, etc.

Or the ones that came from family money.

For ever Van Gogh and Hemingway, there were thousands of others who couldn’t hack it, didn’t go viral, so to speak, couldn’t hack it and either perished by hunger or their own hands, changed careers, moved back home or were otherwise assigned to anonymity.

In other words, they couldn’t handle the pressure.

We are all vessels that require pressure to form into something great.

Sure, too much pressure and our vessel can break or even shatter altogether, G-d forbid.

But if we proactively apply pressure to our own vessel, we can forge it into something stronger, more beautiful, more capable, capable of more.

Circumstances are not always in our control, of course.

Life and death intervene.

Financial cycles ruin our best-laid plans.

People don’t behave how we expect them to.

We get too high on our own happiness or too low on our misfortune.

We get caught in too many vicious cycles, rather than virtuous ones.

We get discouraged too easily when things don’t go our way.

Some few people in this world are built as if “asking for” pressure.

Genuine optimists, creatives, entrepreneurs, doer-dreamers.

It’s as if chaos and difficulty “just follow them everywhere.”

It’s as if they even seek it out proactively!

Weirdos. LOL.

Let’s think here a moment.

It’s a pretty insidious thing to imply this, on the surface.

None of us actively seek suffering… right?

Well, yes and no.

Suffering can become a habit, as well.

With age, with a certain personality and/or worldview.

But I don’t mean the Debbie Downers or grumpy old people.

I mean people that proactively take on a bit of suffering (too many commitments, cutting off people that are bad for them, even if they’re close, more exercise than they think they can handle, writing a new book, taking a side job, starting a podcast, etc.).

Such people (I’d count myself among them) take on more than they can chew, or at least that’s what everyone around them thinks.

No way in hell could you write that book, it’s too ambitious.

No way could you handle two or three jobs.

You’re gonna teach a course when you’ve never done it before?

I don’t even now sometimes if this is an actual voice or just a default that sits in my head and that gets tuned down when spoken to.

James Altucher is the poster child of this. He talks a lot about taking on too much, the damage it causes, but also the amazing things that happened to him because he took on a job for which he wasn’t qualified, how he built things he wasn’t “qualified for,” etc.

Sometimes, the timing is off (too early, usually), but at some point, you get better at the timing part and success hits.

But you’ve got to be one persistent, stubborn mofo.

Family and friends will pour salt on your wounds, will convince you that you’re wrong not to take a day job, not to see the light, not to go for the stable option.

And it’s not that they’re entirely wrong, either.

This isn’t a black-and-white thing.

Einstein was a patent clerk when he wrote his big papers. He had to support himself because anti-Semites blocked him from academia.

T.S. Eliot was a banker. Phillip Glass was a plumber and taxi driver. Here’s a long list of others.

Is it ideal?

Of course not. Because you can’t devote yourself fully to your craft.

Or maybe it is. Depends on the person. Depends on the situation.

It’s not what pop culture teaches us.

It’s always “all or nothing” with art or science or creative pursuits.

It is, unless it’s not.

Some people need that something “other” to push them to succeed in their “passion” field.

Otherwise, they might peak too early, not go as far, get too discouraged, etc.

The stability of a day job might provide some respite from all the nagging or threats.

It might, ya know, put bread on the table, feed the kids and all that.

Nothing dishonorable in it, whatsoever.

It doesn’t mean creative ruin. It doesn’t mean a dulling of the senses.

It sometimes just means, ironically, more time and peace to work and create something truly remarkable.

It all depends on the subjective situation.

So maybe, instead of working for decades to afford a second house, maybe the key is to take a low-key desk job and enable yourself to create without the constant pressure of no food, no money, no peace and no luck.

Maybe it’s a bridge.

Maybe it’s just an honest living with its own dignity of work.

But either way, the pressure of multiple jobs, of taking on too much, of doing too many things does get to be too much sometimes.

Not enough rest, too much action.

But at least it’s chosen pressure, which can be modulated, rather than forced pressure one doesn’t expect and can’t own or change easily.

According to the ways of physiology, it’s always better to undergo mild stress in order to react better to bigger stress.

Think taking a cold shower, taking the stairs when there’s an elevator, eating the fruit (or nothing at all) when there’s lots of candy around, etc.

Such tiny choices create tiny habits, which create changes in your life that accumulate a lot faster than you think.

And that, my friends, is how adding pressure strategically to your life can craft your art, your science, and create success in your chose field.

You’ve got to always be driving the bus, unless you want to be run over by it.

Hence my whole platform, “Be Your Own Commander-in-Chief.”

And now, I leave you with the epic song you all know:

Don’t let the pressure get to you! Apply the pressure yourself, strategically :)

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A bit of fun press from the last week:

Quoted in Newsweek as a CHRO:

Did a radio show in LA about workers talking about sex at work (even to their bosses!!):

Tune in at 4:45

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We’ve launched the Commander in Chief Community 

WHAT’S INSIDE?

Basically, this has all my best stuff, coaching and consulting materials, latest tools, my book split into chapters, with a whole bunch of my best trainings, workshops, writing, podcast episodes you name it.

Oh yeah, the premium stuff?

When you subscribe (and help me pay the damn bills, only fair), you’re gonna get:

1) Group coaching - career, business, life, whatevs

2) Private monthly trainings and workshops. Think:

a. getting promoted,

b. getting paid more,

c. building a 6-figure side business,

d. building a brilliant personal brand.

3) Special discounts for 1-on-1 coaching

You’re gonna LOVE this. Yeah, it’s pretty MASSIVE value, amigo/a.

Time to get off the sidelines.

Like, this is basically all the best stuff I’ve ever produced, with weekly updates and a ton of new stuff.

YEP, IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING!! GET EXCITE!

And NOW, I’m gonna make you an offer you can’t refuse…

THE COMMUNITY IS FREE TO JOIN FOR THE NEXT 14 DAYS.

I don’t want to hear any objections. You straight up have ZERO EXCUSE, homie.

Get in there, get active, help me keep building this amazing community.

Seriously, what are you still doing here? LOLZ.

Get in there and make some noise. Intro yourself.

Send this to 5 of your friends. NOW. Seriously. Pretty, please 🙂 

See you on the inside.

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Whether it’s the first time, or if it’s just been a while, let’s connect and get to know each other (better) as humans.

1. If we haven’t connected yet, connect with me on LinkedIN. I post some super useful stuff there, as well :)

2. Put 30 minutes on my calendar to chat. No strings attached, whatsoever.

Let’s get to know each other (in many cases after not chatting for a long time) as humans, friends.

Of course, if there’s something I can help you with, just ask and I’ll do whatever I can to ask.

Here’s my calendar link, again.

Don’t be a stranger, friend.